The questions people asked me most often over the course of 2024 were versions of: “how does coaching work?”, “why is coaching different?” and “what makes ontological coaching different?” I put this article together in response to questions such as these.
How does coaching work and why is it different?
The video uses an analogy where we human beings live in a dark room, with a flashlight attached to our heads.
As a result, we only ever see a part of the room, and our view is always subjective and never complete.
Given the propensity of human beings to want to be right and certain, this analogy in itself is challenging. Very often, one of the first jobs of a coach is to enrol their client into this possibility and this alone can take some time, before it is fully absorbed.
A client who sees themselves as objective and correct in their view of the world is a challenge indeed because they will only seek change outside of themselves, in the external world.
To continue the analogy, coaching is different because of where the coach shines their flashlight.
- Teachers shine their flashlight onto new parts of the room, previously unseen by their student.
- Consultants shine their flashlight onto parts of the room previously unseen by the client, but valued as useful by clients with similar objectives in the past.
- Mentors shine their flashlight onto parts of the room that they personally have previously explored, and they think might be of value for the other person to hear.
- Leaders shine their flashlight onto areas of the room that they have identified as valuable for others to explore (and then enrol them into a journey of exploration)
By contrast, a coach shines their flashlight onto the client themselves. This is something that the client is unable to do for themselves and is what distinguishes coaching from the other modalities listed above.
Shining the flashlight on the client illuminates the client’s assumptions, beliefs and worldview. Over time, these have become so familiar to the client that they have become invisible. It’s “just the way things are”.
The room is the content of the client’s life. The flashlight is the context of their life.
By shining a flashlight on the client, the coach illuminates the client’s context, rather than giving them access to more content.
Teachers, consultants and mentors give the client more content by shining their flashlight onto new parts of the room. They are content providers.
By shining their flashlight onto the client themself, coaches offer the client the opportunity to brighten and expand their flashlight beam, thus seeing content differently. Coaches are context illuminators.
But how does this work in practice?
A simple example.
The client wants to improve the relationship with their boss.
Teachers, consultants and mentors will provide more content:
- Teachers: Provide generalised information, based on past experience
- Consultants: Provide tailored information, based on what clients in similar situations have done, and what their research suggests will work for this particular client
- Mentors: Provide information about what they have done in similar situations.
Coaches support the client to see how they are currently seeing and approaching the situation. They illuminate the client’s current context.
With the current context illuminated, new possibilities become visible, and the coach supports the client to develop strategies and implement practices that were not previously available to them.
None of this is to suggest that coaching is better than these other modalities. Indeed, using them in combination can often be a very potent force.
However, it does show why today’s predilection for more and more content and the “quick fix” (“5 minute abs!”) so often leaves people frustrated and disappointed.
This idea is not new. Albert Einstein pointed to it in his 1946 essay “Atomic Education”
“A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to move toward higher levels.”
An idea often re-expressed as:
“We cannot solve problems at the same level of thinking that we were at when we created those problems”
What makes Ontological Coaching Different?
Click here to watch a video where I outline the key distinctions of ontological coaching.
To continue the “dark room” analogy.
The beam shone by the ontological coach is more intense and focused on the client as a whole human being. It illuminates far more of a client’s context than do other coaching methodologies.
While other methodologies, such as performance coaching do shine the light towards the client, they tend to focus on what the client is currently doing. The GROW model is a good example of this:
The client identifies a target (Goal). The coach then focuses on the current situation (Reality) and works with questions and feedback to elicit new options (Options) before the client agrees on the actions to be taken (Wrap up)
By way of contrast, the ontological coach will focus on how and who the client is currently being.
The word “ontology” derives from two Greek words: ontos = “being” and ology = “study of”
To support them in this endeavour, the ontological coach will use further distinctions in being human. All human beings necessarily have a body, emotions/moods, and language.
Taken together, these three distinctions create the way in which human beings interact with the world, invisibly shaping their interpretations of what is occurring.
To take the same example as we used above:
The client wants to improve the relationship with their boss.
The ontological coach will use these three distinctions (and others) to go much further in their exploration with the client. For example:
- What emotions come up / don’t come up with regard to the boss and what does that tell the client about how they are seeing the boss and themselves in this situation?
- What happens to the client physically when they think about and/or meet the boss?
- What language is available to the client around the boss (can they make requests / say “no” for example)?
- What language do they use to frame their assessments about themselves and the boss?
- What have they decided is “true” and “false” about their boss (and themselves) in this situation?
By enquiring more deeply and supporting the client to develop a sense of curiosity in these areas (and others), the ontological coach takes the process of making the invisible, visible to a whole new level.
The impact of shining this intense flashlight beam on the client’s body, emotions/moods and language is to open up far deeper possibilities for growth and development in the client’s way of seeing, thinking, feeling, experiencing and sensing (their context)
Because these possibilities are more deeply rooted in the client as a holistic human being, genuine sustained transformation (as opposed to one-off changes) now becomes possible.
Very often these deeper possibilities involve a client re-assessing and making new choices, not just about their future actions, but about their very identity and who they are being in the world.
This is the subject that I wrote about in “Start with Who”, published in 2022.
Check out the power of the “Start with Who” approach in this video.
Conclusion
Coaching works differently because of where a coach shines their flashlight.
While teachers, consultants and mentors shine their flashlight on the dark room, giving access to more content, a coach will shine their flashlight on the client themselves, illuminating the client’s context.
This “context illumination” is extremely powerful not only because their context dictates what they can and cannot see in the dark room, but also because it then shapes the interpretation of every piece of content that they see.
Ontological coaching goes further than other coaching methodologies in its exploration of the client’s whole being, rather than simply their doing.
The ontological coach’s flashlight is not only focused more squarely on the client as a whole human being, it also carries a more intense beam, supported as it is by fundamentals of “human being-ness” that begin with body, emotions/moods and language,
While all coaching methodologies aim to create sustainable change, it is ontological coaching that is best placed to offer the possibility of genuine transformation.
Postscript
Very often, once I set out the distinctions of ontological coaching, people are intrigued to know more about becoming an ontological coach themselves. It is certainly a fascinating path to travel and one that remains fresh to me after more than 20 years on the journey.
Should you wish to know more about this path, or about engaging with an ontological coach/facilitator then please contact me at
We utilise a highly experienced and truly global faculty team to run ICF accredited programs in both Ontological Coaching and Ontological Team Coaching. Our next Newfield Coach Certification Program is now open for registration. Find out more at www.thecoachpartnership.com.
Marcus Marsden
Managing Partner, The Works Partnership & The Coach Partnership